Those Cheeky Brits! – Personals from the London Review of Books

I just finished brunch with my dear friend Richard Pfleger.  He is a wonderful human being,  very bright, interesting, intellectual and always has something erudite to share.  Mix in a bit of a goofy sense of humor like mine and he’s quite enchanting.  I channeled the ‘Barefoot Contessa‘ and whipped up sweet potato pancakes, blueberry syrup (cannot take credit for the syrup – I am NOT Martha Stewart I assure you), fresh blueberries, cheese egg scramble, coffee & OJ.  It was quite delightful if I do say so myself ::::smiling and wrinkling nose:::::::  We sat out on the back deck, overlooking a lush green yard.   Midmorning…not too terribly hot yet.  A bit humid.

Amid all the conversations and stories, Richard was telling Danielle (my friend’s daughter who I’m house sitting for – she’s l8 and an adorable red head) about a play called Personals.  Two guys, two girls, exploring the personal ads.  That joggled my memory about a story I heard on NPR about the London personals.  This came from the London Review of Books, an unlikely place to see personal ads to me.  BUT, the ads are quite hysterical.

Keep in mind, these are REAL personals – they aren’t placed just to amuse us.  That’s what makes it all the more hysterical!

Here are a few:

PERSONALS (London Review of Books)

All box number replies should be addressed to the relevant box number and sent to:

London Review of Books 28 Little Russell Street, London WC1A 2HN, UK

We advise respondents to take due precautions when answering personal ads.

  • I was recently victorious in a small claims court and with my compensation cheque I’d like to take you (F to 48) on a weekend bicycling trip to the Lake District Centre Parc. This offer doesn’t include meals or alcoholic beverages. M, 53.
  • My dream dinner party would feature Jaroslav Hasek, Churchill and Robert Walser. I would get drunk and abusive and retreat to my room to fix the carriage return on my vintage Imperial Good Companion. You would come to placate me, only to be hectored about Erik Satie’s umbrella collection. Male, 31, no lover of dinner parties.
  • Bioinformatics (!) researcher (27, North London) seeks girlfriend. Gothic lit fan preferred.
  • Semi-detached youngish man (62), wide range of interests from the mind, through politics, to rugby invites younger woman to tour the highlands end July in E-type. Meet London or nearby to check compatibility.
  • Cynical is the new sexy. Call me old-fashioned, but I’m not buying that. Seeking like-minded, 60ish m, kind, smart, funny, for friendship/romance. Supple upper lip welcome. Must love classical music and dogs.
  • More Helvetica Neue than Times New Roman. Coolly passionate, bookish, stylish F academic, 40, seeks M who’s sorted yet edgy for art, film, books, politics, typography. London.
  • HIGHLY SUCCESSFUL UK/INTERNATIONAL BUSINESS MAN seeks English Rose. UK based, age 45, tall, dark, attractive, with traditonal values, seeks his ONE-PLUS-ONE, SOUL-MATE with a view to marriage and a family. He’s utterly genuine, charming and romantic, a modern day Mr. Darcy. You too, will have traditonal values, 30-40 max, relationship minded, intelligent, feminine, gentle, looking for marriage and a family. He is a rare find! Contact Jill, Rhodes-Harvey Introductions
  • Professor, still sexy, seeks erudite man.
  • More Helvetica Neue than Times New Roman. Coolly passionate, bookish, stylish F academic, 40, seeks M who’s sorted yet edgy for art, film, books, politics, typography. London.
  • 85 is the new 75. Fourth age widower seeks a nostalgia-resistant lady friend who enjoys conversation with a bookish drift, occasional expeditions and ardent embraces, and generally finds the later decades of life tantalizing.

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